Friends,

  I am now back in Nairobi after three months in the US.  It is very good to be back home, even though I am going through the chills and a virus cold, feeling weak and having to sleep a lot of extra hours. There is always something to remind us this is not heaven or even close to it!  Here it is winter, overcast a lot, damp at times; with no heat in our rooms I feel the chill too easily.  I am wearing my Pendleton wool shirt with a pullover on top of that; windows and door are closed too.  I don't feel a lot of pep.  I am not long from crawling into bed again, and it is only 11 AM.

  Today is a major feast of one of the most important saints of Christianity:  John the Baptist.  I just love the scripture readings at the mass celebrating him.  I hear in them much of God's own goodness to my own self.  I have worn on my neck chain for years a medal commemorating John.  His words "May He (Christ) increase and I decrease" have always spoken to me, strongly.  But even more than those words I resonate very strongly with what John says in the gospel of John the Evangelist:  "My joy is to hear the voice of the Bridegroom "(implying Christ coming to claim His bride.)  This is one of the better ways of explaining why there is so much satisfaction for those who guide the souls of others in retreats and formal spiritual direction.  You witness the amazing action of God in the desires, thoughts and longings of others who have an ongoing, conscious relationship with God.  As John was a 'matchmaker,' helping people connect with God and to know and love Jesus,and so drawing so much satisfaction from this work, so do I and others like me with this privileged work.  We are matchmakers.  It seems there is no better work!  No greater satisfaction in what one can do, serving God and God's work in the hearts and souls of others.

  Today during prayer I sensed the utter insufficiency of every expression, verbal and otherwise, in responding to God as God deserves.  The reality of God, the indescribable goodness and beauty of God, leaves every human expression of praise and thanks limping badly when compared to what God deserves.  Truly, the Spirit of God in our depths must be called upon to pray and to utter what God deserves.  All creation falls short in giving fitting praise and thanks.  Only God can give to God what God deserves.  Thank God there is the Holy Spirit to do just that!  Thank God there is the Eucharist making this possible!

  All for now!  I am off to bed.  I can't force myself any longer!

Bernie Owens